Ah, Yorkshire pud with Parmesan and nougat

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Thanks for coming: Carbone may be pondering the crowd size a pre-season game at Bradford
Photograph: SIMON WILKINSON

Summer summary: Oh, not much. The manager who took Bradford to promotion and kept them in the FA Carling Premiership jumped ship to relegated Sheffield Wednesday and was promptly replaced by some bloke nobody had ever heard of. Then they signed the most unpredictable player in he world. Probably. Not forgetting their InterToto exploits.

Transfers in: Benito Carbone, (unattached) free; David Hopkin (Leeds United) £2.5 million; Dan Petrescu (Chelsea) £900,000; Ian Nolan (Sheffield Wednesday) free; Peter Atherton (Sheffield Wednesday) free.

Transfers out: Lee Mills (Portsmouth) £1 million; John Dreyer (Cambridge United) free; Scott Taylor released; Andrew Patterson released.

Looking forward to: The bursting of a few more inflated Premiership egos. Visiting by far the country’s best club shop (claret and amber nougat, Stewart McCall key-rings, fantastic clocks complete with Match of the Day alarm). Quite how the rest of Chris Hutchings’s squad react to Benito Carbone’s estimated weekly wage of £30,000.

Worried about: The very same — the Italian’s first public tantrum may be coolly received. Whether Dean Saunders’s knees can last another year. The prospect of another comeback for Neville Southall, surely the most frightening moment of last season. Hutchings’s severely retro hair.

Liabilities: As at least one newspaper put it when Hutchings was appointed — "Chris who?" The man himself admits that "this offer came totally out of the blue", and much will depend on how quickly he can win the trust and respect of his players. It is not a complete impossibility; Paul Jewell was hardly a household name, after all.

Tactical profile: Huff and bluster, working together, each for the other, not particularly pretty but can be ruggedly effective (delete as appropriate or enter own preferred cliché). The likes of Liverpool, Sunderland and Arsenal fell for it last season, although where Carbone fits into that efficacious equation remains to be seen.

Style: Not much, to be honest. Yorkshire puddings with Parmesan. Bantams wearing alice bands. One player they need: The irrepressible Dean Wandass was their top scorer with ten goals last time and that while alternating between midfield and attack. An out-and-out striker has been a priority, especially since the sale of Lee Mills to Portsmouth. Hence their move for Ashley Ward of Blackburn Rovers.

Up and coming prospect: Andy O’Brien, the 21-year-old centre-half, has already made 115 league appearances for City, so he can hardly be described as a prospect, but he is the real deal. Even Dad’s Army needed Corporal Pike in their ranks in terms of age if not talent. Young Saunders might make it, too.

Potential of new signings: A fairly astute bunch. Atherton and Hopkin will bring red meat to the team, Petrescu will provide pace and Carbone guile. Expecting so many new players to gel with immediate effect is an order of some magnitude, however. Sample headlines: "David Hops Off", "Dan to the Petrescu", "Bye-bye Beni".

Least likely TV soundbites: From Carbone: "To prove my loyalty, I want to pledge the rest of my career to Torino/Reggina/Casert/ Ascoli/Torino again/Napoli/ Internazionale/Wednesday/Aston Villa/Bradford. On reduced wages of course." From Hutchings: "I’m gobsmacked. I never expected to be offered the Manchester United job this soon."

If Bradford City were a movie it would be: Alfred Hitchcock’s Vertigo. Whatever you do, don’t look down. And no more Titanic jokes, please.

Prediction: Another long season is interrupted when Carbone signs playing contracts with every other club in the country. "I’m delighted to be here," he says. In April, chairman Geoffrey Richmond officially assumes control of team affairs, assisted by Michael Knighton. Aside from that, a lorryload of trouble.

GEORGE CAULKIN

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Squad: 1 Gary Walsh; 2 Ian Nolan; 3 Andy Myers; 4 Stuart McCall; 5 David Wetherall; 6 Gareth Whalley; 7 Jamie Lawrence; 8 Robbie Blake; 10 Benito Carbone; 11 Peter Beagrie; 12 Ashley Westwood; 13 Matt Clarke; 14 Andrew O’Brien; 15 Dean Windass; 16 Lee Sharpe; 17 Aidan Davison; 18 Gunnar Halle; 19 Isaiah Rankin; 20 Peter Atherton; 21 Dean Saunders; 22 Wayne Jacobs; 23 Mark Bower; 24 Gareth Grant; 25 Scott Kerr; 26 Dan Petrescu; 30 David Hopkin.

Stadium: Bradford and Bingley Stadium

Capacity: 18,276

Address: Valley Parade, Bradford, West Yorkshire, BD8 7DY

Telephone number: 01274 773355

Clubcall: 09068 88 86 40

Official website: www.bradfordcityfc.co.uk

Gritty, solid, although visually unappealing. The promised "lick of paint" will be complemented by a new statistics section and a chat forum with such monthly guests as the manager.

Unofficial site: homepage.ntlworld.com/bantamrollercoaster

The Bantam RollerCoaster offers news, history and each month lists famous football dates for that month, which for August, includes the astonishing 1-0 away at UniBond Premier League’s finest Altrincham, in a pre-season friendly.

Manager: Chris Hutchings

Player/Assistant manager: Stuart McCall

First-team coach: Malcolm Shotton

Chairman: Geoffrey Richmond

Ticket details: 01274 770022 ticket office

Ticket prices: £20-£32 (depending on the opposition)

Cheapest/most expensive adult season ticket: £255/£408

Recommended radio station: Bantams 1566AM: BCFC’s own.

Programme: £2

Fanzine: City Gent

Cost of adult replica shirt: £39.99

Training ground: Rawdon Meadows, Apperley Bridge

Directions to ground: Nearest train station is Bradford Forster Square (three quarters of a mile). Numerous buses go from the station to the ground, which is to the north of the city, on Midland Road which runs parallel to Manningham Lane (A650).

Pubs near the ground: The Oakleigh, 4 Oak Avenue; The Park Hotel, next door.